What we are comparing is the correct line of thinking that is in line with reality "Personal Development Model" . To a line of thinking that leads to stress and is not in line with reality "get your life Right Model". When we are stressed it is because our thinking is not in line with reality...This gives a great opportunity to reflect on what it is that stresses us out.
When we stress it is because we are using the "Get your life right model" Where you are not flowing with life’s ups and downs but trying to get life to go to your specific plan. This is the right path thinking. This thinking is great when things are going right, but when you don't reach the goal that you are striving for then you are in a world of hurt because you have attached so much of your self-worth to the outcome of your goals. When you don't get your goals you see yourself as a failure.
"Get Your Life Right Model".
— That you are on the wrong path and all that is needed is to dust yourself off and get back on track
— You are on the wrong path you are missing out on the experience that you should be having
— That you could have made a different choice at the time and things should be different
— That I am worth-less. I am not a valuable contributor to society because I have not achieved what I was supposed to achieve.
The Basic difference
"Personal Development Model"
— That there is no wrong path and that life is a journey of ups and downs
— If you are not and can never be on the wrong path, therefore you can never miss out on life and it’s lessons
— You couldn’t have made a different choice because of you only know what you know at any given time.
— That you are not worth-less because you are always contributing to yours and everyone you come in contact withs personal development.
Over the next short while I will go into each one of these points and pull them apart for you.
Wednesday 16 September 2009
Tuesday 15 September 2009
4 Lenses, How we view life and how this causes stress
4 Lenses, How we view life and how this causes stress.
When we are stressed, you can bet that it is not a single event or a number of events for that matter, It is how we are looking at life, how we interpret theses events. And understanding what the different lenses that we are looking at life through that leads to stress and depression is important. Almost as important as finding out what your dominant lens is. To do this we need to understand what the different lenses are. The good thing is there are only four lenses. ( I will go into greater detail at a later date)
These are the lenses that lead to stress anxiety and depression.
1. The wrong path. That life is not going to plan and we are doing something that we don't want to be doing therefore we are on the wrong path.
2. Missing out. That because we are having this event that we don't want that we are missing out on the good stuff we should be having.
3. Should have could have. I or they should have or could have made a different decision. And if that other decision was made I would have everything I wanted.
4. Self-worth. We are always learning and growing and are part of everyone that we meets lessons as well. We are always 100% @ 100% of the time
When we are stressed, you can bet that it is not a single event or a number of events for that matter, It is how we are looking at life, how we interpret theses events. And understanding what the different lenses that we are looking at life through that leads to stress and depression is important. Almost as important as finding out what your dominant lens is. To do this we need to understand what the different lenses are. The good thing is there are only four lenses. ( I will go into greater detail at a later date)
These are the lenses that lead to stress anxiety and depression.
1. The wrong path. That life is not going to plan and we are doing something that we don't want to be doing therefore we are on the wrong path.
2. Missing out. That because we are having this event that we don't want that we are missing out on the good stuff we should be having.
3. Should have could have. I or they should have or could have made a different decision. And if that other decision was made I would have everything I wanted.
4. Self-worth. We are always learning and growing and are part of everyone that we meets lessons as well. We are always 100% @ 100% of the time
Why we Stress/ get Depressed
We stress in life because of our thought pattens, nothing more, nothing less, its that simple.
How we have come to get these thought pattens is also quite simple. We have participated in life.
We formulate these thoughts or beliefs from interaction with others. Parents, friends, the media, reading blogs etc....
If we are stressed/depressed then we have an incorrect belief about the reality of the situation. We are looking at life through a incorrect lens. Our view our lens , the way we look at life is incongruent with life's reality.
Even though we are told this time and time again, no single single event causes stress/depression. Not one, nothing, no way can any single event cause you stress. It is how we look at that single event that causes us stress or to be depressed. It is our belief about the event that causes us stress or get depressed. If the event caused depression, everyone who got divorced not some but everyone who got divorced would be depressed. I've been divorced and I'm Not depressed......
How we have come to get these thought pattens is also quite simple. We have participated in life.
We formulate these thoughts or beliefs from interaction with others. Parents, friends, the media, reading blogs etc....
If we are stressed/depressed then we have an incorrect belief about the reality of the situation. We are looking at life through a incorrect lens. Our view our lens , the way we look at life is incongruent with life's reality.
Even though we are told this time and time again, no single single event causes stress/depression. Not one, nothing, no way can any single event cause you stress. It is how we look at that single event that causes us stress or to be depressed. It is our belief about the event that causes us stress or get depressed. If the event caused depression, everyone who got divorced not some but everyone who got divorced would be depressed. I've been divorced and I'm Not depressed......
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